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Post by offbeat69 on Dec 3, 2005 0:21:43 GMT
I may have already made this joke, but I still find it funny. Still finding it funny is also my excuse for posting a joke that was only topical ten years ago. Try saying it out loud to get the joke if you're particularly stupid, and Google O.J. Simpson if you're particularly uninformed.
What's O.J. Simpson's website address?
http:////////////////////////////////
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Post by Dr Eggfan on Dec 3, 2005 16:34:58 GMT
I thought the answer was //\Esc (slash, slash, backslash, escape).
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Post by offbeat69 on Dec 3, 2005 16:39:29 GMT
That's also funny, yes. Shame there isn't a key for "buy your innocence, despite clearly being guilty."
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 3, 2005 17:03:11 GMT
yeah it's caled the microsoft customer care service
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Post by MeesChees on Dec 3, 2005 21:58:18 GMT
My keyboard doesn't seem to have that one. I really need to upgrade.
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Post by MeesChees on Dec 8, 2005 20:30:06 GMT
What do you call an elephant with a spade?
Dawn French.
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Post by supersy on Dec 9, 2005 12:18:08 GMT
The Conservatives winning the next General election under David Cameron (They stand more chance with DJ in charge!!)
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Post by Golden Dragoon on Dec 24, 2005 21:06:19 GMT
I think they aught to have put in that guy from big brother as the leader
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Post by voodoo on Dec 24, 2005 23:30:07 GMT
Nadia?
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Post by Jamie85 on Dec 24, 2005 23:43:24 GMT
Haha. Rofffle.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 25, 2005 0:01:01 GMT
the portugeezer?
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Post by Golden Dragoon on Jan 1, 2006 15:09:37 GMT
no that Derek bloke, they gay foxhunting guy
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Post by asmodai on Jan 2, 2006 23:10:49 GMT
A nun is sitting in the bath when there's a knock on the door. 'Who is it?' she says. 'It's the blind man' comes the reply. So she thinks, it's ok, he won't see me naked and tells him to come in. The man comes in and says 'Blimey, a naked nun. Now, where do you want this venetian blind?'
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead get into a lift, and notice a white sticky patch on the wall. 'That's funny' says the brunette, ' that looks like spunk.' The redhead sniffs the wall and says 'yep, and it smells like spunk'. The blonde puts her finger in the sticky patch, licks her finger and says 'Well, it's nobody from our office'.
What's the difference between a blonde and a roadsign? Roadsigns sometimes say stop
Blonde girl goes to the doctor and says, 'I hurt all over.' She presses her finger into her knee 'That hurts.' Then she presses her finger into her stomach 'That hurts,' and then she presses her finger into her forehead 'Even that hurts. What is it, doctor?' The doctor replies 'You have a broken finger'
Why do men like blonde jokes? Because they can understand them!
How do you get a man to always leave the toilet seat down? Cut off his penis!
Why do men get married? So they can stop holding their stomachs in.
Whats the difference between a clitoris and a golf ball? Men will spend hours looking for a golf ball
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Post by Deleted on Jan 8, 2006 16:33:13 GMT
a blind man goes into a shop, picks his dog up by the tail, then starts swings it around his head. The shop assistant says "excuse me sir, can I help you?" The blind man replies "No it's ok, just having a look around"
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Post by dreamboy3000 on Jan 12, 2006 19:46:28 GMT
So a Pakistani US citizen goes to the doctor because he just simply doesn't feel good. He's tired, his stomach is upset, he has a headache. Just feels terrible. The doctor checks him over and can't find any medical reason for him to feel the way he does. He offers a Naturotherapy approach that he has seen work before. The Pakistani man is stunned, though, that the treatment means he has to go home, shit and piss into a plastic bag and leave it in his basement for a week. "Trust me," the doctor says, "I have seen this work." The man goes home and follows through on the instructions. Within a day, though his house smells terrible and by the end of the week, it is an overwhelming stench. His eyes water every time he walks in the door, but he feels no better. He calls to yell at the doctor who calmly says,"Go down and take three big deep breaths directly from the bag and you will be cured." "You're crazy!" comes the reply. "Trust me," says the doctor. Down he goes into the basement and he takes the first breath. Gagging and choking, he does it again. Then, on the third breath, he feels the headache leave. His stomach settles and he feels amazingly well. The stench is even tolerable. He calls the doctor to tell him the good news. "I told you I've seen this work with people from Pakistan before," says the doctor. "You were just homesick!"
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Post by offbeat69 on Jan 12, 2006 22:16:05 GMT
Boo. Get out.
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Post by voodoo on Jan 12, 2006 22:19:10 GMT
that was shit
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Post by dreamboy3000 on Jan 14, 2006 10:49:17 GMT
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Post by voodoo on Jan 14, 2006 10:55:01 GMT
she's dead knobf**k
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Post by Jamie85 on Jan 14, 2006 12:34:37 GMT
No, the racist joke wasn't funny.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 14, 2006 15:34:39 GMT
no it wasn't.
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Post by MeesChees on Jan 14, 2006 20:31:30 GMT
But some are, e.g. Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He's black! As long as you're just being ironic.
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Post by supersy on Oct 26, 2006 10:50:30 GMT
Q. Why's Madonna like a typical British Housewife? A. She lives in a large estate, Always goes round wearing a tracksuit, And now has three kids from three different fathers. (Heared that on H.I.G.N.F.Y)
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Post by dreamboy3000 on Oct 26, 2006 12:00:23 GMT
A muslim woman knocked on my door the other night. I spoke to her through the letter box to see how she bloody likes it.
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Post by offbeat69 on Oct 26, 2006 12:08:39 GMT
f**k off, you racist cock.
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